I did all the rest of my shopping daydreaming about the tartar sauce and then it occurred to me to check the freezer section for vegan fish. Lo and behold: Sophie's Kitchen Vegan Fish Fillets had been there all along. I grabbed a box, went back to pick-up the tartar sauce, and was on my way.
The "fish" was a bit orange for my liking, but it did smell slightly oceanic (points for authenticity?). It took a little longer to heat than indicated, but that could be because A) I had the gas turned down in order to reduce oil splatter, or B) because I was unclear from the directions whether or not I was supposed to thaw the patty before cooking (I didn't).
The tartar sauce was a thick, appealing consistency. Too rich to try on it's own, with confidence I generously coated my bun with it before dressing with tomato and onion (I really like condiments).
The first bite I mostly noticed the tartar sauce. Not as pickly as I was expecting, but still ridiculously delicious. As for the fish? Tastes like chicken! I mean, I don't really remember what either tastes like, but it looked and tasted no different than the chikin patties I can recall eating as a vegetarian. Nonetheless, the crispy-fried coating in concert with the tartar sauce was a success.
I did find it curious that the company tauted konjac root so prominently on the box,
yet it was listed as a powder: 7th out of 13 ingredients, the first being (non-gmo) textured vegetable protein. Also, where was the seaweed?
Ultimately, the "fillets" are not something I would eat on a regular basis, but the tartar sauce is awesome! So overall it was nice to have an old-skool sammie fix- be it faux fish or chicken.